Column: The mystery of the mowed message

The Latest Local News from the Cedartown Standard

Editor’s Note: As a April Fool’s Day treat, I decided to turn my amused wit upon a personal happening at the Myrick household, with some, ahem, embellishments added on to improve the overall story. Hope everyone enjoys this week’s “story” prompted by a kind return of favor by a neighbor. – KM

The Mystery of the Mowed Message

A lungful of clean cut grass was what greeted the weary traveler upon arriving home late one Tuesday evening from work. It was a surprise, since said traveler did not get the lawnmower out to tackle the chore. Unless the weariness was so great the traveler now was lapsing into forgetfulness.

When was the yard last mowed? October?

Further investigation of the shed proved the lawnmower was unused, and by the collection of cobwebs on the gas can it remained untouched too.

What then, was this witchcraft? Who, or maybe even what, mowed the yard.

Once inside, the lady of the house proved no more helpful in the inquiry. Rubbing sleep from eyes struggling to focus, the question was repeated.

“Have any idea who mowed the yard?”

A question was served back, continuing the contest as a matter of course.

“Someone mowed the yard? Maybe that’s why the mower sounded so loud next to the window while I was trying to sleep earlier.”

A pause, the weary traveler head dipped in amusement at the lady having missed the apparent show.

“Seen what the yard looks like yet?” the weary traveler asked.

“No. Why?”

“Come, follow and see what has conspired while enjoying the dreamworld,” the traveler said and took the lady’s hand, leading her to the front door. Once open, the lady covered her smiling face with her hands in mock shock.

Mowed into the front yard of their home was a simple message: “Cut Me.”

“Now who would go and do such a thing?” the weary traveler asked.

“Obviously someone with a sense of humor.”

The message clearly called for action, but not the kind the weary traveler took up. Instead, puppies were put on leashes and attempts to put their keen noses into action by finding the culprit in the neighborhood with a walk.

All the search accomplished were new places for both dogs to leave their mark and one angry neighbor shouting about the dogs lifting their legs against a fire hydrant.

Questions the next day were posed to next door neighbors over friendly fences, but each gentleman of the house proved just as clueless to who might have cut the message in the grass.

“Either way, it seems like the thing to do is take hold of what its saying,” one neighbor said, the smirk growing with every word. “Seems like the yard could use a trim there, son.”

Sure enough, this turned into a true Scooby Doo mystery and by evening of the second day the weary traveler had enough and got out the old John Deere.

Within an hour of pushing against the thick growth of crabgrass and winter weeds, nothing remained of what the wicked soul left behind in the front yard. The neighbor who offered the friendly prod came back over to the fence once the job was done.

“Looks good, don’t it?”

“Guess so. Still need to get a weedeater for the edges.”

The neighbor took a sip from an ice cold glass of lemonade, condensation dripping from the side of the glass as the weary traveler brushed sweat from a wrinkled forehead. A simple nod, and the gentleman walked away back to the front porch.

Briefly turning before going up the steps, the neighbor shouted back “guess it helps to leave the editor a note instead of asking sometimes, don’t it?”

It wasn’t proof, but enough to take the lesson to heart. Keep the grass cut, Kevin. Otherwise get ready for more fun pranks in the future.

Source: Cedartown Standard

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